The resilience to keep going leads to success
The resilience to keep going leads to success.
We all know it. The film industry is brutal. It is full of knock backs and doors closing. It has to be there are only so many projects and only so many roles available. Someone has to miss out and that someone is all of us. Some take it a little harder than others and some quit all together, but when you land the gig and the friendships and fun you have on set becomes a memory, it is all worth the knock backs.
If you spend time studying anyone who has achieved success they all have one thing in common. they had the ability to take the setbacks in their stride and to keep on going. This is resilience through the ability to endure anything and to move on and not let it drag you down
In a world surrounded with the mentality of the victim and trophies for participation we can see that it has removed the ability for some to endure lifes set backs and to move on. Some people have never developed the skills for resilience, because they never had to as a child. This is a shame because this ability to endure and move on is a necessary skill in the entertainment industry.
The reality is that whatever happens to you as a person is only the concern of only a few people in your life, your family and friends. Most other people aren't even thinking of you, how could they there is nearly eight billion of us now. Then there are some who have no one to even care about them, not even one, not even themselves, not anymore.
Everyone else has their own stuff going on and they can't carry anothers baggage as well and it is arrogant to assume that they should.
You can expect people to treat you with kindness within reasons but if you want more attention in their minds it is better to earn it through integrity.
Resilience development releases the pride trapped within yourself. If something goes against you or you look a fool, who cares. Everyone will have a laugh but that will end and you will do something else. To be resilient means you would shorten the time you take action again. If you take a few days or weeks or months, even years, then you are just delaying your own success and are wasting the time you have here, this is your life. Do things and become great.
Every high point and every low point in your life is just an event that has repercussions and a price to pay but you don't have to live in that moment or event for the rest of your life.
Resilience can heal all wounds and right all wrongs.
With resilience comes positive outcomes, and it can be improved upon.
Psychology Today describes resilience as “that ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever. Rather than letting failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise from the ashes.”
This is your ability for “Bouncing back” which is done when facing disappointment, defeat, or failure, but instead of wallowing in a moment and letting things keep us down, we get back up and dust ourselves off and continue down our path in life.
Mental toughness is often associated with resilience but try to think of the difference as “a personality trait which determines in large part how individuals deal with stress, pressure and challenge irrespective of circumstances” (Strycharczyk, 2015).
Resilience helps people recover from an event in life, but mental toughness helps people avoid experiencing a setback in the first place, but also to learn quickly from any failures.
“All mentally tough individuals are resilient, but not all resilient individuals are mentally tough” (Strycharczyk, 2015).
The mentally tough are not only able to bounce back, but embrace a hardship challenge and approach it with a positive attitude.
“It’s your reaction to adversity, not adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop.” - Dieter F. Uchtdorf
What are traits of resilience?
- The capacity to make realistic plans and take steps to carry them out.
- A positive view of yourself and confidence in your strengths and abilities.
- Skills in communication and problem-solving.
- The capacity to manage strong feelings and impulses.
- Sense of autonomy (having appropriate separation or independence from family dysfunction; being self-sufficient; being determined to be different—perhaps leaving an abusive home; being self-protecting; having goals to build a better life)
- Calm under pressure (equanimity, the ability to regulate stress levels)
- Rational thought process
- Happiness and emotional intelligence
- Meaning and purpose (believing your life matters)
- Altruism (learned helpfulness), love, and compassion
In addition, these characteristics are associated to resilience:
- Character (integrity, moral strength)
- Curiosity (which is related to focus and interested engagement)
- Balance (engagement in a wide range of activities, such as hobbies, educational pursuits, jobs, social and cultural pastimes)
- Sociability and social competence (getting along, using bonding skills, being willing to seek out and commit to relationships, enjoying interdependence)
- Adaptability (having persistence, confidence, and flexibility; accepting what can’t be controlled; using creative problem-solving skills and active coping strategies)
- Intrinsic religious faith
- A long view of suffering
- Good health habits (getting sufficient sleep, nutrition, and exercise; not using alcohol or other substances immoderately; not using tobacco at all; maintaining good personal appearance and hygiene)
“No matter how much falls on us, we keep plowing ahead. That’s the only way to keep the roads clear.” - Greg Kincaid
Resilience is good for your health
You can grow and develop resilience and here are a few of the wide range of reasons that resilience is a great trait to have:
- Greater resilience leads to improved learning and academic achievement.
- Resilience is related to lower absences from work or school due to sickness.
- It contributes to reduced risk-taking behaviours including excessive drinking, smoking, and use of drugs.
- Those with greater resilience tend to be more involved in the community and/or family activities.
- Higher resilience is related to a lower rate of mortality and increased physical health (2015).
Research on resilience suggests that resilience leads or contributes to many different positive health outcomes, including:
- The experience of more positive emotions and better regulation of negative emotions
- Less depressive symptoms
- Greater resistance to stress
- Better coping with stress, through enhanced problem-solving, a positive orientation, and re-evaluation of stressors
- Successful ageing and improved sense of well-being despite age-related challenges
- Better recovery after a spinal cord injury
- Better management of PTSD symptoms (Khosla, 2017).
Further research suggests that resilience boosts immune system functioning to better manage negative emotions and experience into positive emotions, which leads to objectively good health outcomes like more immune system cells and better immune functioning in cancer patients, and more favourable mortality rates in marrow transplant patients.
“Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.” - Hellen Keller
It's an important mindset to have, because on your way to success you will need to handle the set backs in the film industry. There will always be someone trying to get your role or an obstacle when you are trying to set up a shoot.
“Resilience is knowing that you are the only one that has the power and the responsibility to pick yourself up.” - Mary Holloway
How do we develop it?
There may be a genetic element for a base level of resilience, but you are always able to improve upon the resilience you have.
Self-learned resilience is built up by yourself through deliberate effort. It is the result of being aware of the opportunities for self-development and the courage to take advantage of them.
There are many ways to build up your own reserve of self-learned resilience.
- Allow yourself to feel a wide range of emotions.
- Identify your support system and let them be there for you.
- Process your emotions with the help of a therapist.
- Be mindful of your wellness and self-care.
- Get some rest or try to get an adequate amount of sleep.
- Try your best to maintain a routine.
- Write about your experience and share it with others (2017).
Dr. Carine Nzodom on using a loss or stressful event to grow
- Find a sense of purpose in your life, which will help boost you up on difficult days.
- Build positive beliefs in your abilities to help you increase your self-esteem.
- Develop a strong social network of people who support you and who you can confide in.
- Embrace change as the inevitability that it is, and be ready for it.
- Be optimistic—you don’t need to ignore your problems, just understand that it’s all temporary and that you have what it takes to make it through.
- Nurture yourself with healthy, positive self-care—get enough sleep, eat well, and exercise.
- Develop your problem-solving skills through strategies like making a list of potential ways to solve your current problem.
- Establish reasonable goals by brainstorming solutions and breaking them down into manageable steps.
- Take action to solve problems rather than waiting for the problem to solve itself.
And remember: Keep working on your skills and don’t get discouraged if it takes a while to get to the level of resilience you desire (2018).
Very Well Mind author Kendra Cherry
- Change the narrative by free writing about the issue or deciding to focus on the positives.
- Face your fears and challenge yourself; expose yourself to things that scare you in increasingly larger doses.
- Practice self-compassion; try to be mindful, remind yourself that you’re not alone, and be kind to yourself.
- Meditate and practice mindfulness; the Body Scan is a good way to work on your meditation and mindfulness skills.
- Cultivate forgiveness by letting go of grudges and letting yourself off the hook (2016).
Kira M. Newman at the University of California at Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center
“The human capacity for burden is like bamboo—far more flexible than you’d ever believe at first glance.” - Jodi Picoult
Take the opportunities that are presented to you and don't be afraid to fail. Everyone successful has failed more times than they have succeeded, but when you when you succeed succeed with great success.
The feeling of disappointment is strong, we have all felt it, but you need to pick yourself up and get back in the game, that is where the wins are. They aren't in giving up or taking a break, that is where regret lives and it is a hollow feeling deep inside you. That is where your momentum is lost and the entertainment industry forgets about you. When you decide what you want just keep moving towards it and eventually you will reach your goal and then the set backs become way back when stories you can tell others climbing the ladder.
If you get no one hundred times and one yes, it is still a yes.
“The difference between a strong man and a weak one is that the former does not give up after a defeat.” - Woodrow Wilson
Resilience is an important trait to have and you have the power to build your own resilience.
We forget about how much power we have over our lives and our circumstances. You do have the power to improve your resilience and build your personal competence and confidence.
“The oak fought the wind and was broken, the willow bent when it must and survived.” - Robert Jordan
Leave a comment and tell us about a moment in your life that your resilience allowed you to achieve your goals. We love a positive story.
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